What is a death anniversary?

20 Jan 2025

How to mark a death anniversary

A death anniversary is always a difficult time, particularly when remembering a close friend, family member or partner. But as time passes, there are lots of ways you can acknowledge the anniversary of a death in a way that honours – and celebrates – your loved one’s memory.

A death anniversary is the moment in time where we mark the anniversary of a loved one’s passing. This could be a particularly poignant one-year anniversary, or anniversaries in later years, including milestones like five or ten-year death anniversaries.

Dealing with a first death anniversary

The first anniversary of a death can be challenging for anyone. If you’re dreading the occasion, here are some ideas for dealing with a 1-year death anniversary.

Go at your own pace

If you still need time to process the grief, don’t feel rushed into acknowledging the anniversary in a formal memorial. If your emotions are raw, take all the time you need.

Take time off

On the day of a death anniversary, some people find it hard to concentrate on their usual tasks. Consider taking a day off work so you can give yourself some space.

Access bereavement support

Speaking honestly about your feelings could help you feel better. There are bereavement support services listed on the GOV.UK website, including one-to-one support groups and telephone consultations.

Reasons to mark a death anniversary

While the first death anniversary is understandably difficult, in future years, you may have a different perspective on how to approach the annual day of remembrance.

But why ‘celebrate’ the occasion? Here are some reasons to remember someone on their death anniversary.

Celebrate a life. After a period of mourning, you may begin to focus on the joy, happiness and positive impact your loved one made on your life and those around you.
Express gratitude. A death anniversary is a chance to say thank you in your own way. This could include a memorial where you showcase your loved one’s talents with a wider audience, or share their most cherished music or memories.
Bring people together. Any memorial is a bittersweet occasion, but it’s an opportunity to invite well-wishers – including from the distant past – to share their memories and to reconnect.

10 ways to remember someone on their death anniversary

If you feel like acknowledging the anniversary of a death, here are some ways you could honour someone on the day.

Visit their place of rest. You could spend some time at the gravesite, or a place where you scattered the ashes, which could provide some solace.
Plant a tree. One way to create a ‘living memory’ for your loved one is to plant a tree, such as willows, oaks or elders, or even a dedicated section of woodland. The Woodland Trust has more information on planting a tree in remembrance.
Revisit somewhere special. Returning to a place of significance and happy memories can of course be emotional, but potentially a cathartic experience.
Go for a walk. By embracing the outdoors you can clear your head, get some inspiration, and take a moment to remember someone on their death anniversary.
Do something for charity. Raising money for a charitable cause can help you transform a challenging experience into a positive legacy. And you can have fun while raising money – from coffee mornings and bake sales to running a marathon.
Create a photo album. A death anniversary could offer a timely opportunity to create a photo album or ‘memory book’ – either by uploading images online or creating a homemade scrapbook.
Play their favourite song. Music is a powerful way of connecting us to others. By listening to your loved one’s favourite song, you’ll be reminded of their fondest passions.
Make their favourite meal. Food can conjure cherished memories, so one way of remembering the departed is to prepare the meal they loved most.
Gather friends and family. Rather than spend a death anniversary alone, why not invite close family and friends to mark the occasion? It’s an opportunity to share memories at the dinner table, raise a toast and feel uplifted.
Write down your feelings. Some people find that keeping a journal, or writing a letter to a loved one, has a therapeutic quality. In years to come, you’ll have something to look back on when you remember that special someone.

Alternatives to a death anniversary

Ultimately, the way we manage the anniversary of a death is deeply personal. If you’re less inclined to acknowledge a death anniversary, you could instead mark the deceased’s birthday, rather than the date of their death. Alternatively, you may decide to do nothing on the death anniversary itself, but instead remember the departed in your own way throughout the year, or at certain times, such as Christmas.

How to acknowledge the anniversary of a death

If you know that a friend or relative is marking the anniversary of a death, there are various gestures they may appreciate:

Send a simple text or instant message to show you’re thinking of them.
Leave a voice note to express your support.
Send a small gift in the post to raise their spirits.
Offer to go for lunch, coffee or a walk if they’d like some company.
Donate to a cause close to the bereaved person’s heart.

Words of comfort on the anniversary of a death

If you know someone who’s lost a loved one and the death anniversary is approaching, here are some ideas for what to say in a message:

“Thinking of you today”
“You’re in my thoughts”
“Thinking of you on your day of remembrance”.

For more ideas on what to say following a death, our Legal & General guide recommends some words of comfort.

Resources for dealing with a death anniversary

Below are some resources and guidance if you’re looking for support ahead of a death anniversary.

Mind has published a list of online resources for bereavement support.
Marie Curie has a dedicated bereavement support telephone service run by specially trained volunteers – find out more.
To find out what to do following the death of a loved one, you can take a look at our guide on what do you do when someone dies.
If you have a bereavement claim on a Legal & General policy we can guide you through the documentation process for what to do following the death of a loved one. Read more.

What to say when someone dies

Knowing what to say when someone dies can be difficult, but we’ll give you some ideas for words of comfort in our helpful guide. Discover more.

What do you do when someone dies

Managing the formalities in the days and weeks after a death can be difficult. Read Legal & General’s guide on what to do when someone dies.

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